Marcos is three years old. Every time his mother says she’s tired, he asks, “Tired? Why are you tired?”. And her little voice is always behind if she tells him that they are going for a walk or that she is sleepy. Marcos’s mother no longer knows what to answer to so many questions from her son.
Really, when a child asks why, he is not always looking for a cause. By three years they already know that actions follow a certain order and are very skilled at knowing when and how to do what they want. In most cases, the whys do not have a single reading. Sometimes it is a game to see how the adult reacts . At other times, to practice his language skills or to see if his parents say something similar to what he thinks.
Thus, if a child asks why mountains are so high, any explanation that contradicts his idea that a giant made them may not even listen to it, even if he has asked it hundreds of times. Of course, we must not forget that when they ask so much it is because they consider that their parents know everything, so that with each answer they also get a greater dose of security.
THE WHY TO REMOVE FEARS
Sometimes children ask questions to chase away fears. If a little one asks: “Why does the dog bite? Why is it wagging its tail? Why is he barking? Possibly so many questions do not have to do with the real cause, but with the fear of the animal . At this stage, your fears often revolve around what you see on television and what you imagine with stories.
It should also be borne in mind that being open to the world often brings with it fears related to what impacts or excites them , such as loud sounds, the dark, the fire engine siren or the barking of a dog. A hug, a sample of something they have done well before, usually calms them down, but this does not mean that they are for hours with the “why” in their mouth, in relation to the object that scares them.
One of the advantages of this verbal training is that their vocabulary is increasing (they can correctly use up to more than a thousand words) which also makes it possible for them to use the words as a link between the world around them and their needs.
THE WHYS AS A GAME AND THE DEMANDING
Sometimes the questions, as well as the repetition of words, from the age of three, are more of a social game , a way of seeing to what extent they arouse interest in other people, to what extent they are accepted. That is why they do not stop asking the why of all things, so they can even be demanding when it comes to getting answers. The demand, in this sense, is more like: “Here I am.” When children repeat the same “why” it is not, however, that they have conspired against anyone, but rather that, as they repeat them and listen to the same answer over and over again, they understand some information that for them it is still very complex.
