How to help a difficult child express his emotions

A “difficult” child is not the product of poor parenting . This information is important, since many parents feel guilty and it is not like that. What is certain is that you have to have a lot of patience, understanding, an extra dose of attention and even a bit of creativity to deal with them. These children generally suppress some emotion , which causes tension, nerves and chaos until they do not even know what is wrong with them. Sometimes they feel anger, sadness, anger, and even boredom.

We face a challenge: we have a special child, more sensitive than the rest, so we have to be clear that behind every anger, tantrum or blockage, what there is is someone crying out for help.

What can we do? Well, basically, follow these 4 steps strictly:

Positively reinforce

Difficult children have low self-esteem and are very fragile, let’s never forget that. That is why we must avoid any negative assessment that the only thing that will generate is more anxiety in the little one. On the contrary, any positive comment such as “I trust you”, “you can do it”, “I am with you and I support you”, “calm down, it will pass” or “you are special” will have a soothing effect that will make you feel loved and not recriminated.

Create quality communication

You have to talk to them daily, really listening to them, without comparing them to their siblings or other children. Without judging them, respecting their ideas, talking and sharing. Avoid laughing at their problems because they are very important to them and they can lose the trust they have already earned. Nor do you question them or start a dialogue with sentences such as: “you are always the same”, “you don’t know how to do anything”, “you won’t be able to”, because this eliminates any possibility of progress in their attitude.

Work on your internal balance

We must teach them that breathing can serve to calm emotions and cure anger, that sharing their sorrows can be liberating and that knowing how to discuss peacefully to reach a consensus, a common meeting point, is of intelligent people who strive. It is also very helpful for them to learn to relax by doing something that distracts or motivates them using the infinite power of concentration. And let them know that crying is not bad, on the contrary, it is an emotion as necessary as laughter. With all this done, it will be easier for them to learn to deal with frustration, since not everything will always be as they want. Now they are ready to learn to listen to others from their peace of mind, the most complicated part of the process.

Humor, empathy and responsibilities

In case we do not know how to get out of the moment of tension, using laughter usually does not fail. Approaching our son with humor, making him see the most ironic side of the situation can be the remedy. Putting ourselves in his place is also good because it will help us to understand him and that he also puts himself in that of others. Asking him if he has stopped to think how his grandmother, sister, or friend might have felt about a past situation, will gradually make him reflect and change his perspective. And, finally, making him responsible for his actions so that he sees and learns that everything one does has consequences will be vital, since it will make him have more control over himself and his environment.

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