Dangers of instilling the need for success in the little ones

It is all very well to teach the child to excel and to pursue what he wants. The problem comes when they are made to believe that only success brings happiness, success being such a relative term: What is success? They say that succeeding in one facet of your life can be the personal facet having the family you were looking for, or professional, financial or spiritual. Unfortunately, almost always the message of society is that success is only to have money and material goods. Success is not measured because you have people who love you or because you wake up looking forward to it every morning.

And this is the message that our children constantly receive: successful is the one who has money and is also [email protected] , [email protected] , has cars, clothes, houses, equally successful partner … So, if in addition to what They are constantly being bombarded by advertising and the media, we also insist that they compete from a very young age because if they will not be mediocre, turn off the light and let’s go.

We should counteract this horrible and superficial message that society makes, logically with the aim of selling more T-shirts, brand name shoes and, above all, to have the population idiotized by trying to look like the models they admire: girl models or soccer players, very rich and very handsome all. And also very untrue… Nobody is as happy as they seem on social networks and nobody is free from insecurities. Not even the most famous.

Of course, we would have to teach our children from childhood what real life is, the one that sometimes rises and sometimes falls. The one where you have to learn to stay when things don’t go our way and where it’s better to cooperate than compete. Because competing is fighting, and fighting is the beginning of any confrontation.

Let us teach our children to be themselves , to love themselves as they are because they are unique, to pursue their dreams but admiring the one next door and learning from everyone. That is happiness, and it is that real happiness, the truth, does not need comparisons and is in the mirror in the morning, right there, when you see yourself and give thanks for everything you have.

 

Dangers of instilling success from a young age:

  • Create false expectations

The child grows up with a wrong idea of how to be happy. You push yourself to the limit and, even if you achieve your goals, you find that it does not fulfill you. Many times you do not feel well because it is not even what you want, but what you think you should do.

  • Encourage unhealthy competitiveness

It is not bad for the child to compete but especially if his character is competitive in itself, you have to balance the aggressiveness that is created by being better than anyone with touches of attention. We can encourage teamwork by highlighting the greatness of each one collaborating by doing what they do best for the whole group, and by teaching them to value the work of others. It is good to participate and also to win, but it is not the only objective. When it is achieved it is enjoyed and when it is not, too, and also you learn (Making a poster for your room with this phrase can be a good idea).  

  • End up anxious and frustrated

If a child is waiting all day to excel and grows with that demand, it is impossible for him to feel comfortable with anything. Little by little you will become an envious and frustrated little person when something does not come out as you want and you will not rest until you get it by living in a routine of anxiety and nervousness that can lead to depression or violence, either verbal or physical.

We better make happy children who will later become fulfilled adults. Life is too short not to laugh every day, even at yourself. And perhaps the real success is that: laugh a lot and try to do what you like. I would be happy if my children lived their life with passion because they dedicate themselves to what they like and even if they were not rich in money, they were rich in illusion and affection. And you?

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