āWe treat everybody the same.ā
It was an innocuous comment really.Ā Assuredly said with the best of intentions.
So why did it get under my skin?
Let me make a few things clear before I begin to blur the common definition of fairness.Ā I do think children need consistency and that they do rise to our (appropriate) expectations.Ā That said, however, I donāt believe that āfairā means everyone gets the same thing.Ā To me, āfairā means everybody gets what they need.
Itās certainly easier to work with absolutes.Ā And itās certainly a challenge to ascertain individual needs and address them appropriately.Ā Thereās plenty of room for error.Ā But thereās also a better chance that you can effectively get to the heart of a child when you see them as that.Ā A child.Ā Each one.Ā Not a cluster of children, but an individual.
Perhaps my personal philosophiesĀ regarding the whole child, the individual learner, implementing developmentally appropriate practices, and working within the zone of proximal development are to blame.Ā
Maybe itās years of experiences working with children seeing their uniqueness and trying to meet individual needs.Ā
When I taught first grade, for example, I had two or three children in particular who struggled more than your average first-grader when it came to sitting at the rug.Ā A one-size-fits-all philosophy would suggest thatĀ anyone whoĀ canāt sit at the rug like everyone elseĀ earns the consequence of sitting with their headĀ down at their seat, spends some extra time inside during recess, or takes a time out.
āWe treat everybody the sameā seems to suggest that you either sit at the rug like everybody else or you receive a negative consequence.Ā But I saw it differently.Ā Ā These kids werenāt like everybody else.Ā The task of sitting knee to kneeĀ with their friends on the rug was particularly challenging for various personal reasons.Ā Ā Why would I treat everybody the same when they werenāt?
Our solution?Ā Whenever these children came to the rug, they couldĀ choose to sit inĀ their chair at the rug (near the back so it wouldnāt get in the way).Ā Sometimes they chose to sit on the rug ālike everybody elseā.Ā Sometimes that worked.Ā Sometimes it didnāt, and all I had to do was ask if it would be easier to bring over a chair.Ā They either worked harder at this challenging task and succeeded or they used appropriate accommodations to help them succeed.
Perhaps the most ingrained experience Iāve had with ātreating everybody the sameā was when I worked as an alternative language aid for new immigrants in an elementary school.Ā It was a position I enjoyed, but toward the end of the year, it was my job to administer the standardized tests to some of the students I had worked with.Ā Some had been in this country for only a few months, and yet, because we had to ātreat everybody the sameā I was not allowed toĀ give directionsĀ to them in their own language.Ā
It killed me to look at these bright children looking blankly at these papers.Ā They were bright kids.Ā But we couldnāt treat them any differently.Ā That wouldnāt be āfairā.Ā āWe treat everybody the same.ā
The truth of the matter is no one treats everybody the same.Ā And no one should.Ā We donāt expect children in wheelchairs to climb the frontĀ stairs, we donāt ask children who are blind to read from the same books as the rest of the class, and we donāt insist that deaf children take oral exams.
Weāve learned to recognize the special needs ofĀ children and try to meet them where they are and lift them higher.Ā But doesnāt everyone have a special need?Ā Some are less obvious and mayĀ take great effortĀ to discern, but itās the same reasoning I use for all children.
Some children need more personal space, others need more social scaffolding.Ā Some struggle with anxiety, others with impulsivity.Ā Some need more attention, others need more privacy.Ā We owe it to the children we love and teach to know them well enough to find their special needs and give them the support they need.Ā Even if that means treating them differently.
Fair doesnāt mean everyone gets the same thing.Ā It means everyone gets what they need.
How do you balance the concept of fairness with individual needs?
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